BOUNCING BACK AFTER A MAJOR LIFE TRANSITION
We all face major life challenges and transitions in our lives. Learning how to cope with them and bounce back can be difficult. Is it any wonder that a divorce is right at the top with the death of a spouse? Followed by moving, major illness or injury, and job loss.
Divorce is a major disruptor in one’s life and can bring tons of stress. Financial, emotional, and even spiritual. For many women, divorce affects their standard of living. They may need to find new housing, a job, go back to work or school. It can be difficult to change the status of living that you are accustomed to. Many families can find themselves struggling to make ends meet.
If you are looking for a character trait to develop, it would be hard to argue against developing greater resiliency. Few people are successful at anything on their first try. Resiliency increases the odds of trying again. And again. And again, until the objective is met. The level of your success is heavily dependent on the amount of resiliency you possess. Any setback in life is more easily overcome if you are resilient.
BOUNCE BACK FROM ANY SETBACK WITH THESE STRATEGIES:
1. MANAGE YOUR RESPONSE
How do you respond to a setback? Do you become determined or disheartened? Are you committed to succeeding or looking for an excuse to quit?
● Anger is better than despair. Peacefulness and curiosity are more useful than anger.
● Are you blaming others or taking responsibility for the setback?
● You know yourself. So, what is the most useful response for you to have?
2. EXAMINE WHAT HAPPENED AND BE BETTER FOR IT
Learn what you can from this setback. If you learn something and apply what you learned in the future, then this setback was useful.
● Did you rely on the wrong person?
● Did you have the wrong approach?
● Did you lack the necessary skill or knowledge?
● What happened and how can you be better next time?
3. TAKE A BREATH
Take a break but avoid taking too long. Catch your breath and get moving again. Avoid feeling pressured or frantic. It is better to take a moment, gather yourself, and then proceed. Any challenge you are facing will still be there tomorrow. It will wait for you.
4. MAKE A NEW PLAN
You tried, you temporarily failed, you learned from it, you gave yourself a couple of days to recover, and now it is time to try again. Repeating this process is as close to a guarantee of success as you can get.
● What is your new and improved plan? Why do you think this idea will work better than the last? Be clear on why it is an improvement.
● What can you do today? Avoid making a plan that you cannot implement any part of for weeks into the future.
5. MANAGE YOUR MINDSET
How are you doing mentally currently? Are you desperate or determined? Are you confident or feeling hopeless? A poor mindset suggests that you do not trust your plan. Ensure that you have a plan that makes you feel confident.
6. REALIZE HOW STRONG YOU ARE
You are not just some random being. You have come from people that faced plagues, wars, wild animals, famines, and every other hardship you can possibly imagine. What you are facing now pales in comparison. You come from hardy stock, and you can overcome, too!
7. GO FOR IT
Give yourself permission to be optimistic and successful. Allow yourself to be a powerful person that perseveres, and gains focus and determination from setbacks. Put your plan into place and tell yourself you are not going to give up until you have the life you desire.
8. AVOID QUITTING Keep going. You cannot fail forever. Eventually, you will bounce back from any setback if you refuse to give up. Some people are clearly more resilient than others. However, anyone can become a more resilient version of themselves with effort and a little self-management. You will find that your success grows in proportion to your resilience. While there are many ways you can attempt to enhance your personal growth, building your resilience is certainly one avenue worth considering.